SANTA’S DONALD OF THE YEAR FOR 2017!

Dec. 18, 2017  By Jack Jodell, American Dissident, N.M.P.  

COUNTDOWN: I hate to put a damper on things this time of year, but I am reluctantly forced to tell you that a most ungodly 1,130 days are still left in this thoroughly tainted administration’s term in office…

Happy holidays, my friends! Burr Deming is off for a few days, so I’m posting this today rather than next Thursday. Burr should be returning with another of his fabulous podcasts next Monday. Well, it’s that time again: our annual Donald of the Year award (formerly known as the Bozo of the Year award) must be given out. Longtime readers of this blog know how, each December, Santa Claus selects a particular moron whose actions, statements, or behavior was so vile and outlandish that he or she be exposed to deserved public ridicule by getting this award. We changed the award’s name this year from “Santa’s Bozo” to “Santa’s Donald” because Bozo the clown was offended that we would twice select Donald Chump, whom NOBODY can stand,  as the first place winner, so  the jolly Bozo decided to pursue other interests elsewhere, and we do wish him the very best.  

As ever, Santa thought long and hard on whom exactly to give this year’s rechristened award to, because Santa is very serious  and precise about this award and wants to make certain that it is given solely to the most deserving person. As always, he had a boatload of prospects to consider this year!

Past recipients have included:
2016 – President-elect Donald Chump
2015 –  presidential candidate Donald Chump
2014 – TIED – self-proclaimed killer of Osama bin Laden Robert James O’Neill and President Barack Obama

2013 – the obstructionist 113th Congress
2012 –  Ex-Hostess Brands CEO Gregory J. Rayburn and his executive board
2011 – the entire Republican congressional caucus
2010 – the obnoxious Phillips “Colon Lady”
2009 – Richard Heinke, the idiot who faked sending his little boy up in a hot-air balloon just for publicity
2008 – disgraced former Democratic IL Governor Rod Blagojevich  

Here are the finalists for THIS year’s award:

POOR TASTE AWARD, a new addition to this year’s consideration, will go to Donald Chump’s Chief of Staff, John Kelly.  Santa was extremely disappointed to see this man, a 46 year veteran of the armed forces, lying as he did in a failed attempt to discredit the account Florida Representative Frederica Wilson gave of the condolence call the President botched so badly to a slain serviceman’s widow. As there can be only one main Liar-in-chief in the Oval Office at a time, Santa will place this guy in a huge “empty barrel” and roll him over Niagara Falls to teach him a lesson.

ANOTHER POOR TASTE AWARD, goes to Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg, for the shameful way he exploited the suffering endured by the inhabitants of Puerto Rico during the devastating hurricane season they had earlier by using the island as a backdrop to feature his cartoon avatar for a goofy new promotion of his. Santa, most disapproving of this, will ensure that Zuckerberg’s toilet and bathtub will both overflow and flood his home VERY soon!

DISHONORABLE MENTION this year goes to Russian President Vladimir Putin, for the deliberate way he sought to interfere with elections, and sew discord in so many other countries, and for the fact that his meddling may have caused Donald Chump to win the 2016 election in this country. Santa, being a lover of  democracy, will rig Putin’s car to shutdown only a few minutes after it starts traveling, and his TV to shut off 4 to 5 minutes after he has turned it on, repeatedly, all year long. Santa hopes these annoyances will keep the meddlesome Putin in his place for a good long time to come!

Another DISHONORABLE MENTION goes to former administration cabinet member Tom Price, who arrogantly assumed he could perk himself by taking private, chartered planes and military planes for his own personal use at taxpayer expense. Santa will see to it that all future flights for Mr. Price, be they public or private, are delayed for at least one full hour.

Yet another DISHONORABLE MENTION for this year goes to Interior Secretary Stinky Ryan Zinke, who not only flew on numerous military planes at taxpayer expense, bit also decreed that his own flag be prominently flown on a flagpole outside his office whenever he was  present in the building. Such gall is only equalled by his pompous commander-in-chief. Santa will remember this pompous moron by promptly throwing an egg on that flag each and every time it is displayed in 2018!

The FIFTH PLACE award this year goes to the still wet-behind-the-ears son-in-law of the president, and one of his chief advisors, Jared Kushner. This wimpy little weasel, a spoiled brat just like his father-in-law, has also lied repeatedly on his security clearance form. where he repeatedly failed to disclose his meeting with the Russian ambassador, plus he has lied repeatedly to Congress. These are serious offenses which could very well lead to his imprisonment. For his gift this year, Santa will place a “Get out of Jail FREE” card on the floor of his soon to be prison cell – but 5 or 6 feet outside the door, where he’ll only be able to gaze on it and wish he could reach it! 

FOURTH PLACE this year goes to pampered White House Treasury Secretary Steve Minuchin. This goofball, a former Wall Street banker, has been living in the lap of luxury for so long that he has apparently forgotten all he may have once known about the value of a taxpayer dollar. That is why this spoiled, exploitive yuppie tried to charter a military plane to take he and his equally-piggish new bride, at taxpayer expense, on a honeymoon jaunt to Europe. He was refused, of course, but Santa wants to make it up to him. Santa told him he could fly free on his sleigh – provided Santa could make Minuchin and his new bride jump out of the sleigh, hand in hand, somewhere over the Atlantic Ocean!

THIRD PLACE goes this year to the President’s VERY spoiled and misguided son, Donald Trump, Jr. Like father, like son, this cretin lobbied heavily to repeal the long time ban on gun silencers, just because he is an avid gun enthusiast and hunter himself. He is every bit as spoiled, ignorant, and insensitive as his father, and that is nothing to be proud of. Santa will reward him with a child’s cap gun, which will go off when he least expects it, each hour, all throughout 2018.

SECOND PLACE goes to  the rancid, ever-mouthy, ever-condescending, ever-lying White House Press Secretary, Sarah Huckster Slanders, for her nearly constant denials of fact, and her propensity to spread DISINFORMATION rather than fact about the President’s statements and activities. As a minister’s daughter, she should certainly know better than to robotically and mindlessly parrot  every lie emanating from Chump’s lips. Santa, being a moral and ethical man, and a superior role model as well, is greatly perturbed by her continual lying and attempts to deflect uncomfortable questions away with devious statements. He was VERY disappointed at the way she deflected a question about possible gun safety legislation following the Las Vegas massacre in October! So, Santa will attempt to tie her tongue into a knot and/or super glue her mouth shut beginning Dec. 26 through New Year’s Eve. After all, enough is enough!  That brings us to this year’s first-prize award winner, and, with a drum roll, Santa reveals  that person to be:
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The winner of Santa’s DONALD OF THE YEAR AWARD for 2017 is, for an unprecedented THIRD year in a row, Presi-dunce Donald Chump! This year, it wasn’t even close – when Santa saw how Chump waited almost a full week to respond to the devastation Hurricane Maria dealt to Puerto Rico, actually scolded the mayor of San Juan for her fully justified complaint about his administration’s slowness to respond, calling her an “ingrate”, then had the balls to tell Puerto Ricans that they were blowing a hole in his budget, and even went golfing before he went down to that battered island territory for a visit, Santa KNEW he had his Donald of the Year without any question! (Thankfully, Santa wasn’t too distracted by the gigantic number of deserving bozos which fill Chump’s administration)! For his grand-prize present, Santa will change Chump’s Twitter machine to message only: “I CHEATED – HILLARY ACTUALLY WON THE ELECTION” for every day the rest of this year!  

So Merry Christmas, everybody! Santa will retire for a day or two to his isolated North Pole workshop, but will resume his manufacture of presents for all good, deserving people next Tuesday or so. All the best to you for a safe, happy, and healthy hioliday season, and I will return on Thursday the 28th with my annual YEAR-END MUSINGS post.
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About jackjodell53

I am an American Dissident trapped in a country where poor and middle class people are constantly being exploited and lied to by a very rigid and conservative plutocratic elite. I believe in government OF, FOR, and BY the people, not one controlled as it now is by corporations and special interests.
This entry was posted in Bozo of the Year, DONALD OF THE YEAR AWARD, Donald Trump, Politics, Presi-dunce Donald Chump and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to SANTA’S DONALD OF THE YEAR FOR 2017!

  1. jerrycritter says:

    A well deserved award, indeed!

  2. Pingback: Santa’s Donald of the Year for 2017! – FairAndUNbalanced.com

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