THIS MAN’S HEARTFELT APOLOGY TO ALL VICTIMS OF SEXUAL ABUSE!

Nov. 30, 2017  By Jack Jodell, American Dissident, N.M.P.

COUNTDOWN: I sincerely wish it weren’t so, but there are still a horribly long 1,148 days to go in this heartless and sexually abusive President’s term in office…  

There has been an overwhelming flood of sexual abuse reports coming forth over the past few weeks involving unwarranted sexual liberties being taken by prominent men over innocent women (and even teenage girls!) who either worked with or for them, or who were acquainted with them in some way.  From Hollywood figures like Kevin Spacey and Harvey Weinstein to television personalities like Charlie Rose and Matt Lauer to political figures like Alabama Senate-hopeful Roy Moore to Minnesota Senator Al Franken to 88 year old House Reptresentative John Conyors, to Texas Representative Joe Barton and  even President Donald Chump, we have seen allegations of unsavory behavior running rampant. These examples are not limited to only one industry,  political party, or religious affiliation.

This is completely shocking and reprehensible!

It is also far more pervasive than we might have believed, and that is truly regrettable. A longtime friend of mine, who herself at age 15 was the victim of such abuse on the job,  estimates that as many as 8 out of 10 American women may have experiened some form of sexual abuse or harassment in their lifetimes, and for me, at least, that number shook me deeply. Many common threads run through these stories: the abusers were mostly prominent and powerful men in positions of authority who should have known better; the victims had feared coming forth with their allegations; some of the victims were ridiculed or were accused by very stubborn and ignorant people belonging to both genders as having supposedly come forth solely for notoriety or for monetary gain, and so on. Others have responded with a flippant and uncaring “but boys will be boys”. or “that happened a long time ago – why are they speaking out NOW?” attitude. Such flippancy callously ignores the possibility that many of these victims feared either financial or social retribution if they had spoken out in prior  times. For this also happens between ordinary men and women, and also man to man or woman to woman, in our everyday workplaces.

It strikes me that a deep-rooted insecurity in both males and females lies at the root of this phenomenon. I am no expert on psychology or mental health – these are only my hunches, but it sure seems that insecurity does play a major role. In our admittedly patriarchal society, males are raised with the idea that they must always take the lead, especially in matters regarding sex, sports, and business.  They are supposed to be the dominant figures and are encouraged to speak up and be active – or suffer the humiliating indignity of being called a wimp, or a weakling, or unmanly. Women are supposedly the “weaker” sex (although that is definitely debatable on a number of levels), and are taught, directly and / or indirectly while growing up, that they should be silent and always defer to the wishes of the men in their lives. To be proper, men are the ones who are supposed to initiate sex, and to rise to leadership positions within their own social grouping, business, or political system. It is a fact that when any person, or animal, is pushed too far, or feels trapped, that entity will lash out and attack those who may be confining them. To me at least, this explains why a number of men try to dominate women, and why many women have finally chosen to rebel. The problem lies not only in the basic unfairness of the situation, but also in the unjustified excesses it can and often does lead to. Weak-spirited men are deathly afraid of being regarded as unmasculine, so some of them, like Donald Chump, do all they can to dominate and control women, including belittling them, scorning them, humiliating them, or, in extreme cases, abusing them sexually. By achieving this sexual dominance, they are able to boost their weak, insecure egos – but at the expense of the women they dominate. Women who wish to rise up against this injustice are labeled by too many as being overly pushy, too ambitious, or are inferred to somehow be immoral in character, The last thing a woman wants, is to be known as as a “cheap slut” who will prostitute herself for any reason. This is decidedly unjust, and all people of reason who are fair-minded must reject this nonsensical double standard! A far better course to follow would seem to be an egalitarean one, whereby people are judged on the merit of their actions as opposed to the gender they are born into.

I have long been against this goofy notion some people have that it’s ok for a man to be promiscuous and engage in as much sex as he can (be”experienced”), but it is NOT ok for women to have as much sex as they want (be a “slut” or “a whore”). Aside from the moral and / or biblical  implications of such behavior, this double standard is patently unfair to women. After all, what good is it for men to have all the fun, but that same fun is denied to women? Sexual release is a pleasurable endeavor which is healthy for everybody to engage in. Why, then, is it shunned for women but allowed and encouraged for men? Where is the justificatoion in that?

Before anyone accuses me of being a sexual libertine, or of advocating laissez faire sex-on-demand for everybody, I will clear the air by stating that I believe good, preferably monogamous sexual relations between consenting partners is the absolute best way to go. Caring and concern for the well-being of the partner , and the sense of acceptance and fidelity it fosters, are of paramount importance! Also, I do NOT condone having sex with minors! Many cultures and religions state that sexual relations with anyone except the person one has married is not only taboo but is also immoral. Yet affairs and homosexual encounters seem to go on all the time…

In this country, at least, there seems to be an incredible fascination (bordering on obsession) with the sex lives of others. Sex scandals occur almost daily in our mass media, and gender innuendoes permeate our mass culture. Sex DOES sell, and we seem to not be able to get enough of it. My common sense recommendations on this matter are:

1). ALWAYS respect the rights of others and NEVER try to manipulate them into having sex with you through the use of either implied or direct threats; 2). Be TOLERANT of the sexual preferences of others, and try not to be a judge, jury, warden, or executioner of the sex partners or practices they choose. By accepting them, you are not necessarily endorsing or promoting what they do;
3). Do NOT impose yourself on others sexually. By this, I mean don’t send them unsolicited pictures of yourself nude, or parade around them in person  without clothing, or even semi-clad. Also, do NOT use your authority status as employer to force those under you to have sex eith you!
4). MIND YOUR OWN DAMN BUSINESS, and quit being so obsessed or concerned with the sexual practices of others around you – respect their privacy!

Lastly, as a man who has told numerous “blue” or “off-color”stories and jokes throughout my life in mixed company, I wish to apologize to any and all whom I may have offended with my behavior. It was not my intent to insult you or make you feel uncomfortable, So please accept my heartfelt apology, as a man, and know that I will make an honest effort to refrain from doing this again. I also ask you to forgive other persons of my gender for any of the sexual harassment or abuse they may have rendered upon you. After all, with racial discrimination,wealth disparity, lack of affordable health care, violence, and warfare so prevalent in our midst, it would seem much better to devote our time and energy to battling those negative things than it does to obsess about the sexual practices and behaviors being engaged in by those around us, wouldn’t it?Let us stop being so righteously judgmental!

Sexual abuse and harassment is rampant and a form of power over others. We need to create a culture where both men and women can speak up about being abused or harassed and not be punished; where justice is served. As far as sexuality, we need to get it together. If people are being harmed, it’s totally our business to protect the vulnerable. If sex is consensual between those of legal age, then it’s none of our business about whose doing what with with whom. Instead let’s make it our business to reduce and eliminate all bigotry that infringes upon others’ freedoms and well-being. There’s a lot of work ahead of us, but history shows we can have hope for a better future!
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About jackjodell53

I am an American Dissident trapped in a country where poor and middle class people are constantly being exploited and lied to by a very rigid and conservative plutocratic elite. I believe in government OF, FOR, and BY the people, not one controlled as it now is by corporations and special interests.
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2 Responses to THIS MAN’S HEARTFELT APOLOGY TO ALL VICTIMS OF SEXUAL ABUSE!

  1. The Val Olson Company says:

    Nice, Jack!

    • jackjodell53 says:

      Thank you, Val, not only for your comment, and for the insights you have provided me with for this, but especially for your decades-long friendship, which I treasure greatly! 🙂

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